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Aug 01 – Dec 31, 2018
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don Miguel Ruiz

 

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Musings of an Awakening Spirit

Stories, poetry & general musings of Rebecca Haywood, a modern-day Shaman with a penchant for bringing the divine into the human experience.
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To All the Boys

To All the Boys
To all the boys and men who helped me heal… Thank you. To my blood brothers, whose friendship gave me the reason to keep reaching through it all because I had proof of a worthy place to aim for... Thank you. And to all the brothers who became that proof, gracing me with a space in which I could just be—not woman or conquest, not victim or survivor—just Me... Thank you. To the...
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Talkin' About Your Revolution

Talkin' About Your Revolution
So much trauma has been awakened in us collectively—new memories, old memories, and the ancient ones that have been carried in our cells. So much to feel and yet such a gift and a medicine to have it here, on the surface, where we can embrace it as we never did before. And we aren’t just revisiting our trauma, we are walking through reporting it, prosecuting it, speaking our story and naming our...
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Let it Burn

Let it Burn
Weinstein, Cosby, Kavanaugh. A fire has been lit and though it may seem to scorch our earth, it also ushers in a newfound fertility. That’s why we must embrace this fire and let it burn— allow its flames to lick at our wounds, to ignite the pain, the shame, the rage unsung and stir the ashes that once buried it.  As a survivor of multiple sexual assaults, I found myself quietly weeping with...
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Retreat Journal ~ Teotihuacan 2018

Retreat Journal ~ Teotihuacan 2018
Day 1: Following my nose to God. Wellll, it has been a magically creative (and full) past couple of months. It has truly been a ‘standing in both worlds’ experience— completing my contribution to another collaborative book (WootWoot!) while navigating the busyness of life. I had to bow out for a bit so I could bow in and honor this space of healing and change. And now, I am so happy to emerge...
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I Ask & I Recieve

I Ask & I Recieve
I ask and I receive. Sometimes we don’t even bother to ask. Other times, we forget to wait for a response... or we simply don’t believe we deserve one (which kinda means we never REALLY asked, right?). I have a new student who wanted to join our upcoming Healer’s retreat, Shamanic Healing Practicum, but wasn’t sure how to afford it. She was about to close the door on it. I told her what...
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Healing & the Human Mind

Healing & the Human Mind
I want to address a question I have received from some of you. It is a question I too once held and that held me away from embracing shamanic healing— If Spirit guides the healing, then why do we need the form? Well, we may not need it but the client does. The form—the words of a prayer, our hands on their body, or the aroma of incense wafting through their mind—provides a...
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Building an Altar

Building an Altar
I like to tell a story with my altars and let the building of it become a healing in itself… INTEND: Like a good story, I start with an intent or theme. Mine was to connect, heal and balance the feminine within me and in humanity. GATHER: With my intent at the lead, I wander my home in search of objects, elements, medicine. Some are clear right away—the how and where they fit in—whereas others...
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Imagination is the Doorway

Imagination is the Doorway
Imagination is the doorway... to everything! Really? Really. Gosh, there is so much that I could say here— how we imagine ourselves into being from our physical health to our financial—but for now, I will discuss the healing magic of our imagination… Beyond great stories and revolutionizing innovations, imagination is a means of manifesting the anything we desire, including healing. Of course, we must put action behind our dreams in order for them...
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Fire Cleansing: Discovering Immunity

Fire Cleansing: Discovering Immunity
This is the story of how I found true immunity, as a human and as a shaman, and set myself free from the ‘Black Magic’ of emotional poison and vexed stories that can contaminate our internal world…  EYES TO THE UNSEEN:It was a beautiful Saturday in Descanso, California. Madre Sarita had a full class of healing students and this weekend was all about Fire Cleansing. I was excited to receive her teaching again....
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Deeper Waters

Deeper Waters
The storms of life roll through.  Some are natural, others unimaginable.  We face them as individuals, as communities and as a world.  They bring fear, the courage born from it, and the reminder of what is truly important as we watch our landscape change forever. In the midst of a storm, our animal self is there reacting in the name of survival.  The adrenaline kicks in to sharpen our mind and fuels an...
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Receptivity: A Vessel Surrendered

Receptivity: A Vessel Surrendered
Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote that receptivity brings us into an “original relation to the universe”; I can't think of a better place to stand as a Healer or as a human. For receptivity is one of our greatest gifts, and its key lies in our nature — in what is inherent to us without the paved streets of the mind.  What is receptivity, but an opening through which we receive. Yet it is...
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A Tale of Two Minds

A Tale of Two Minds
This is the tale of two minds, The Domesticated Mind and The Soul Mind, and how, through the Toltec practice of Dreaming, they came into one. So what the heck is the Domesticated Mind, the Soul Mind or this thing called Dreaming? Well, as you may know, I had the privilege of a direct apprenticeship with don Miguel Ruiz, author of the Four Agreements, and his mother, Madre Sarita, renowned Toltec Curandera. So...
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Retreat Journal ~ Teotihuacan 2017

Retreat Journal ~ Teotihuacan 2017
Day 1: So good to be 'home' with my Papi! We had such a beautiful first day with the group, dreaming Teo through the eyes of the Healer. We started our day with Madre Sarita's practice of communing with the elements, praying with them and using the energy of the Sun to bless and purify water as a 'balsam of healing for humanity'. Then into Teo to commune with the elements within...Atetelco -...
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Leap of Faith

Leap of Faith
So often we focus on what we DON’T want and we end up aiming right for it.  Why?  Well, our attention is the channel that directs our intent and so wherever we focus, there we are.   I have said before that life is a series of awakenings, and that each of those awakenings is a stepping stone forming our path to self-realization.  Sometimes the stones are set further apart and require a...
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Call to Action

Call to Action
One important step in manifesting our desire is a simple one — to listen.  Once we have lit our candles and said our prayers, literally or figuratively, we must listen for Life’s answer.  For the answer will inevitably come with a call to action.  In my last blog post, ‘Crying Prayers’, I spoke to ‘becoming the invitation’ by surrendering to the asking and that, no matter our faith or our desperation, Life is...
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Crying Prayers

Crying Prayers
I used to think that in order for my prayers to be effective, they required absolute faith.  I had spent years overcoming the voices of doubt and mastering the embodiment of faith that I witnessed flowing so effortlessly from my teacher, Mother Sarita.  When she prayed, her words were like a pointed arrow, piercing its target without even a hesitation of doubt.  I mimicked her energy until I too found its force moving...
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The Day the Sun Stood Still

The Day the Sun Stood Still
Tomorrow the December Solstice begins.  Those in the southern hemisphere celebrate a summer sun at its peak while us northerners greet the shortest and darkest day of winter.  Wherever you stand on this day and whichever season you savor, it is a time for stillness and redirection - a perfect preparation for the New Year. A Solstice occurs twice a year and marks an apex of proximity and a shift in the sun’s...
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The Death of Prince Charming

The Death of Prince Charming
In today's society, the search for true love often trumps the search for God but each is a worthy quest that, with the right map, will bring you to the same place— you.  I struggled for years in my relationships with men and with God. Though I was raised to be an independent and self-sufficient woman, I secretly sought completion. I pushed and I pulled on their love. The part of me that felt broken...
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What is True Now?

What is True Now?
What is all this talk of ‘living in the now' and why is it a key to an authentic and joyful life? Well, it goes beyond a simple spiritual slogan.  The fact is, the only place from which we can affect change is in the present moment — not the past and not the future, for they don’t exist.  Sure we project ourselves there constantly, replaying regrets and hoping for a better future,...
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The Keys to Happiness

The Keys to Happiness
Like crickets in the night, Spirit is all around us and is in constant communication with us.  Its song guides us through the darkness and into our ‘field of dreams’, orchestrating its aria in response to our deepest desires; and when we follow its call, we live in grace with the movement of the moment and in alignment with our life’s purpose.  The how of it rests within our heart.  Mother Sarita taught...
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