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Musings of an Awakening Spirit

Stories, poetry & general musings of Rebecca Haywood, a modern-day Shaman with a penchant for bringing the divine into the human experience.

Resistance of the Trauma Self: Part 2: The Freeze

Resistance of the Trauma Self: Part 2: The Freeze
Yesterday, I flipped the conversation about our resistance to healing and embracing our trauma self into an exploration of how the trauma self resists that embrace, even from You, the guardian. I introduced a new framework for identifying her resistance—the freeze, flee, or fight response. I shared that my trauma self has resisted my embrace in these three ways and cycled through them, just as she did when the trauma first occurred. I...
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Resistance of the Trauma Self: Part 1

Resistance of the Trauma Self: Part 1
My last few posts addressed the rebellion against our trauma self and this “walking in two worlds” medicine. Next up: resistance manifest and how our trauma self freezes, flees, or fights the “essential embrace”. 

As a healer, I understood the manifestation of one’s resistance to be based on density. The longer and stronger it was held, the more physical it would become—moving from a spiritual disconnect to a mental one, then emotional, and...
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Opening the Door to our Trauma Self

Opening the Door to our Trauma Self
What opens the door within oneself? ...to peer beyond the veils of protection that we placed in front of our trauma? …to pierce the heavy silence, the frozen fear, its secrets, its shame? ...and to do this walk that I and so many of us are on, or wish to be on— this walking in both worlds with our trauma self finally risen from shadow and with our guardian self at the ready...
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Welcoming our "Triggers"

Welcoming our "Triggers"
I received so many response to my last post—about healing trauma and walking in two worlds: as the self needing to be healed, and as the one offering that healing—that I want to deepen the conversation, to invite you deeper into your process by sharing more of my own. So that’s what’s up this week and until Spirit (which includes you!) invites another topic to the table. First up is this word used...
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Patchwork Quilt: Part 4: Reweaving the Trauma Self

Patchwork Quilt: Part 4: Reweaving the Trauma Self
In my recent posts, I have been discussing a vision I received: a patchwork quilt which represented my life and all the selves within it, connected by a single golden thread—the one Self that flows through them all. It has delivered a big medicine for me and the healing of a hidden sexual trauma recently uncovered. This has been the toughest piece of trauma work I have ever had to do because it...
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